Fostering - Family Link

Interested in fostering but not sure you have the time at the moment? Want to make a difference to a child’s life but not sure how to fit it all in? Family Link might just be what you’re looking for. 

Give a little time, make a big difference

Family Link is just one of the many ways you can make a difference as a foster carer. Family Link is a collaborative provision between AfC's fostering services and the short breaks service. Its aim is to offer regular overnight short breaks for children with disabilities. As a family-based service, Family Link carers are approved foster carers who typically provide a minimum of two overnight stays per month for a child.

Short breaks are important, they offer children with additional needs and disabilities the opportunity to enjoy activities, try new things, develop their independence and form friendships outside of their immediate family. It also gives their parents and carers a chance to take a break from their caring responsibilities. 

A different kind of fostering

Family Link carers are carefully matched with children and families, and spend time getting to know each other. When everyone is ready, the child comes to stay overnight on a regular basis. This is typically for a minimum of one weekend, or two nights per month, but it could be more, depending on what you are able to commit to. Some family link carers are matched with one child, and others may be matched with more than one, again, this depends on what you are able to provide.

The overnights are planned in advance, so you’ll know when children are coming. Plus they are flexible, so if you have a holiday booked for example, with notice, the overnight date can be changed. 

It can be an incredibly powerful experience for all, and often Family Link carers become important members of the child’s extended ‘family’. Many of these important relationships last a number of years, and overnights, or ‘sleepovers’ as some families call them, become something the child really looks forward to. 

For our families, the difference this makes can be enormous. As one parent puts it: 

"Our Family Link carer has literally changed our lives. We are now able to leave our son, guilt free and assured he is safe, happy and stimulated"

Don’t just take our word for it though - hear it from one of our fabulous Family Link children:

“Because I love it so much, I will give it more than 10 points. It is 89,700 and 298% good! I think Michelle and Sam are the top 10 most amazing people that I have ever met in my whole life and they really do put a great big smile on my face. You have both changed my life and you are my besties forever. Thank you so so much, I feel very privileged!”

Read below some inspiring accounts from our Family Link carers and learn more about the meaningful connections they help create:

Karen's story

Steve and I have been providing respite and short breaks to children with disabilities for over 20 years now, and we are still going strong!

We first started because when our daughter, who has a disability, was younger, she was supported by a programme called ‘Share the Care’. It is an incredible service where she would go out one day a month with an approved carer called Carol. With Carol, our daughter got to go and do all of the things she loved with a person she trusted and felt safe with, she got to experience new things and meet new people in a safe way. That also gave us the time to go on bike rides with our sons and watch football or rugby matches with them. These were things we were not able to do with our daughter as she did not like doing them and instead preferred ‘girlie things’ like having her nails painted.

When she went to college and was in residential, we wanted to give something back to Kingston so we got in touch with our daughter’s social worker. We both worked full time but wanted to be able to help a family as we had been. They linked us up with the ‘Share the Care’ team.  It became apparent that with this service, we could still become carers and continue working. 

Once we were assessed and approved, we were matched up with a young boy called Josh. He used to come to us for dinner once a week and eventually he came for sleepovers. He became part of our family and we became part of his. Josh is 35 now and we still see him, he comes to visit or we go to visit him. 

A few years later, Share the Care was not able to continue offering overnight/sleepovers. We wanted to continue them and could see the positive impact sleepovers were having on Josh. We applied to become foster carers. We were assessed and approved with a plan to do respite care as we knew we would not be able to foster full time due to our other commitments. We provided respite to main foster carers that needed a break and had some short-term placements. 

About six years ago, we were then introduced to the service called Family Link, which is very similar to ‘Share the Care’. With Family Link we get matched with a young person, get to know them and their family and build lovely relationships over time. We love this role and have now supported over 20 different children and young people with days out, activities and sleepovers. 

We love our Family Link days, we will always plan something fun to do together, based entirely on the young person and their interests. We go to the beach, go on bike rides, to the park, we do crafts, bake together, puzzles, play games, anything and everything. Each child we look after does a drawing or painting and when they come to stay, we hang it on the wall. They also get to choose their bedding so it feels personal to them and that it is their special space. 

With Family Link, you make connections for life. We have seen the young children we supported from when they were small grow into amazing adults. I just feel like we are an extension of their families, we get on really well with the children’s families. Unlike mainstream fostering, we are able to communicate and get to know the child’s family members directly. We can arrange our calendars and plan our days well in advance, directly with the children’s parents or carers. This role has taught us never underestimate a child, with a disability or not, we have supported children to be able to do things we never thought possible. 

In Family Link we are supported so well by Katie, our Family Link Worker. She is there to make sure we are ok and doing everything we need to be doing. She also helps us with ideas, activities and prompts or aids for the young people such as visual schedules with pictures. If we ever have any worries, we speak to Katie. We are open and honest with our families and they know we speak to Katie. 

Family Link is perfect for our family, we know that one weekend a month we will have our linked child. It allows us to plan and have flexibility. Sometimes our (now adult) children come with us, sometimes it will be just time for us and our linked child. 

This role is extremely rewarding and keeps Steve and I young! 

Challenges 

In terms of challenges, it can take time to really get to know the child you’re linked with. You will always have lots of information about the child on paper, but you don’t know the child until you meet them in person, get to know them and them you! Sometimes their interests can change, so you can have a routine of a certain food they love then suddenly they come and now don’t like it anymore so you have to find something else they like.

Children can become dysregulated at times, that is perfectly normal, however, we are so well supported and feel equipped to respond as we are able to attend training courses and speak to other family link carers or Katie if we need help. Each child comes with their rule book and schedule so you can follow it. You have a handover with their parents/care givers so you know what kind of day or week they have had. 

Our tips 

Never be frightened to say no and never be frightened to ask for help. It is better to know your limitations. Support and guidance is readily available and fantastic. We have regular supervision with Katie where we can talk things through and work things out. 

We would not have been doing this role for so long if it wasn’t so rewarding and fun. If you’re thinking about doing it, get in touch. We have a wonderful fostering community of other foster carers who can talk to you about all aspects of fostering and family link. 

Best bits

Seeing the children laugh, having so much fun. We get to do so much. Some of the children aren’t able to do things or have the experiences we can give them with family link, one child had never been to the seaside before, we got to see their face as they first saw the sea!

Lucy's story

I first decided to be a mainstream foster carer when my own children grew up and I had space in my home and a lot of love to give. Initially, I did mainstream fostering which was fantastically rewarding. However as time went on, I realised I needed more flexibility in my day to day life. I did not want to stop fostering, so I was introduced to Katie, our Family Link Worker. I have never looked back. I loved the concept, I was able to provide well needed breaks to parents and families that needed it whilst being able to care for children, get to know them and support them. 

I am currently linked with a teenager who has lost her sight and has a diagnosis of Autism. We got to know each other gradually, with meet ups and tea. We slowly built this up with longer time together and then eventually sleepovers. She had never had a sleepover before. We have built an incredible relationship. I have also built wonderful relationships with her parents. She stays one night or 24 hours a month at my house and then once a week, I meet her off the school bus at her house and we often go to an after school activity such as drama or music. I also spend time with her during the school holidays, the provision here is 1 day for every week off school. So this summer  we will spend time together and I’ll take her out and about for 6 days spread over the 6 weeks.  We have a great time together, going to new places and doing different, fun activities. 

It works so well for me. I know which weekend a month and which evening I will see my young person. She has now got to an age where we are preparing her for independence. 

I had never worked with or supported a person with sight loss before, however, I was able to go on training and learn about how best to support and care for a child who has lost their sight. By the time sleepovers started, I felt confident and equipped to have a lovely time together. 

My tips

Do not be afraid to ask for help or say no. The service will support you and it is better to know what you can do with support or cannot do. People can be worried about asking for help or sharing if they are nervous, be as open and honest as you can as this will help you succeed. 

One of the most rewarding parts of this role is seeing the smile on my young person’s face. Doing activities or going to places they have not been to before. Watching them grow and develop. 

There is a wonderful community of Family Link workers within the service. Katie is amazing. The training is fantastic. 

If you’re interested but are not sure if you have the experience, give it a go. There is so much support and training and you are linked with your child in a steady way that feels right for you and your child.

 

 

Would you like to be a Family Link carer?